This is a trick question. There is no age at which a child can make these decisions, until he/she turns 18 and the court no longer has jurisdiction over them.
There are, however, a few methods by which a child can have input in the process. 1. An attorney can be appointed for the child. If the child is old enough, the attorney can advocate for the child’s wishes; 2. If there is a custody evaluation, the child will be interviewed and the evaluator may take the child’s views into account; 3. The child can testify in court. I never have children testify and am opposed to it. Judges do not want children to be involved in the process and it is generally thought that the less a child can be involved in the process, the better. That being said, an attorney can help a parent to advocate for their child’s wishes.
{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
I am a mother that lost custody because I moved to Texas. I was the phycological parent from the day he was born to he was 10. I was never married to his father and because I bought and sold houses I was considered unstable. My son’s attorney clearly knew that he wanted to be with me but ruled that he stay with the father rather than me because they felt he would be the better parent to continue a relationship with me etc. None the less I don’t speak to my son very often because they dont let him talk to me, they dictate my flight schedules causing me financial hardship, my son calls me crying saying that they talk bad about me, not covering my son on health insurance causing me to pay huge amounts in cash payments, and childsupport, not paying for his portion of flights, all on a $12hr salary. My question is since they didn’t listen to his wishes at 11 when will they consider his wishes? Can I file contempt because he is not living up to the court order making it easy for me to have a relationship with my son?
Mary:
Children are allowed to make decisions for themselves when they are no longer minors. However, as children approach 18, their preference has more weight. A key consideration is the ability to get the preference in front of a Judge. Judge’s almost unilformly dislike parents that ask children to testify in custody and parenting time proceedings. Talk to an attorney about getting a children’s attorney re-involved, or about doing a parenting time or custody study. In order for contempt to work as a remedy, there has to be a willful resistance to or obstruction of the court’s authority, process, order, or judgmetn. We previously blogged about contempt as a remedy for parenting time violations here. Contempt can also be used for some financial obligations. You should go over your judgment with an experienced family law attorney to see what can be done.
Hi me and my soon to be husband have been trying to get custody of his daughter my soon to be step daughter for two years now, court hearing after court hearing we finaly had the last court hearing and because the dad was not very stable the first two months of her life, the mother got full legal custody with 50/50 parenting time, so altgough we have week on week off, it is very painful to see our now three in a half year old daughter kick and scream when she has to go back to her mothers house, she douse have a step sister that is only 6 weeks yonger than her who has been in her life since they were both 7 and 8 months old, plus she has a baby sister who is 9 months old. We are very stable with a beautiful home and always taking the girls out and spending time with them 24/7 we don’t belive in daycare or babysitters, wile the mother is always dropping off my step daughter to any one that will take her and has moved over six times in two years, it breaks our heart to see our little girl scream don’t leave me daddy and jenny please she says every time we have to take her to her moms house. And now the mother is demanding half of her co pay that she pays for medical insurance, when she makes more money than us and we have three kids to suport she only has one. What should we do? Can she demand money from us even after the court said no child suport it demanded sence we have 50/50 paranting time?
Hello, I just want to know weather it’s illegal or not if a parent has no rights or what so ever to see their children. My brother’s ex ran away from the family, leaving him with 2 kids for 3 years. She came back and fought for the children physically and although they were not married legally, she won the case and have custody over the children. She claims that he had beat her causing her to have bruises all over her body. The child testify, and all they asked the child in court is weather or not the child was “hurt” in the process. When the child said “yes”, they gave custody over to the mother. Now he has no rights to see his kids because she has a restraining order on him. What advice can you give about this case?
oh yes and i forgot to add that the mother lives in California while the two children are living in Kansas with her family. Is that legal for her to do that? she claims that their babysitter is in Kansas.
Hello : I have a 13 year old girl that wants to live with her grandmother . However i said no . She says that she read that she take me to court and testify against me . I just wanted to know is this possible ?